Well, here I am. The next level of life I suppose. Boy do I feel homesick. It's such a change here coming from where I was. I'm already so lost and feeling inferior to all the talent here. Hopefully I'll find my place. Hopefully it'll find me as well. Looking back, I miss those days. So carefree. Childhood had such an innocent feeling to it. Quoting a passage here:
"Lollipops turn into cigarettes. The innocent ones turn into sluts. Homework goes in the trash. Mobile phones are being used in class. Detention becomes suspension. Soda becomes vodka. Bikes become cars. Kisses turn into sex. Remember when getting high meant swining on the playground? When protection meant wearing a helmet? When the worst things you could get from boys were cooties? Dad's shoulders were the highest place on earth and mom was your hero? Your worst enemies were your siblings. Race issues were about who ran the fastest. War was only a card game. And the only drug you knew was cough medicine. When wearing a skirt didn't make you a slut. The most pain you felt was when you skinned your knees, and goodbyes only meant until tomorrow? And we couldn't wait to grow up."
Now I would have to say all of that isn't true. And yes, some of it is just part of life. But to think, just to think just for a couple of minutes, that was all true. That was all the innocence we left behind. At least stored away for another time. But, you know how good it would be just to relieve a moment in the past? One good moment and hit rewind all the time? I think it would be great. But that's just me. Of course I would love to hit fast forward and see what the future has in store, but that also creates a fear. A fear of knowing what will happen and if I could change it or not. Change. Such a determining word.
Change is inevitable. Spell check that but whatever. I'm pretty sure I've written about change before, but I'll hit on it again. It's just a matter of adaption. Adaption both of the person who is experiencing change and who is witnessing it. How can we adapt? What are the correct ways? Is there one? Do we try to stop it? Do we try to accept it? Who, what, when, where, and why? Well, maybe not all those 'w' words, but you get the drift. I'm facinated by change. However, it's not all good.
You know when you get that feeling in your body that you're just about to break? Oh, I do. Well, not exactly break, but you know. Like an overwhelming sense of nervousness or anxiety. It freaking sucks. Especially in a place where you know very few people and can't physically communicate with old friends and family. I could break off and go into communication right now, but I think I'm going to hold it off for here. It's getting a bit to depressing. Sorry for that. And no, I'm not depressed. Just tired, anxious, worried, and a whole lot of other emotions. Anyways, take care. Have a good night.
"Lollipops turn into cigarettes. The innocent ones turn into sluts. Homework goes in the trash. Mobile phones are being used in class. Detention becomes suspension. Soda becomes vodka. Bikes become cars. Kisses turn into sex. Remember when getting high meant swining on the playground? When protection meant wearing a helmet? When the worst things you could get from boys were cooties? Dad's shoulders were the highest place on earth and mom was your hero? Your worst enemies were your siblings. Race issues were about who ran the fastest. War was only a card game. And the only drug you knew was cough medicine. When wearing a skirt didn't make you a slut. The most pain you felt was when you skinned your knees, and goodbyes only meant until tomorrow? And we couldn't wait to grow up."
Now I would have to say all of that isn't true. And yes, some of it is just part of life. But to think, just to think just for a couple of minutes, that was all true. That was all the innocence we left behind. At least stored away for another time. But, you know how good it would be just to relieve a moment in the past? One good moment and hit rewind all the time? I think it would be great. But that's just me. Of course I would love to hit fast forward and see what the future has in store, but that also creates a fear. A fear of knowing what will happen and if I could change it or not. Change. Such a determining word.
Change is inevitable. Spell check that but whatever. I'm pretty sure I've written about change before, but I'll hit on it again. It's just a matter of adaption. Adaption both of the person who is experiencing change and who is witnessing it. How can we adapt? What are the correct ways? Is there one? Do we try to stop it? Do we try to accept it? Who, what, when, where, and why? Well, maybe not all those 'w' words, but you get the drift. I'm facinated by change. However, it's not all good.
You know when you get that feeling in your body that you're just about to break? Oh, I do. Well, not exactly break, but you know. Like an overwhelming sense of nervousness or anxiety. It freaking sucks. Especially in a place where you know very few people and can't physically communicate with old friends and family. I could break off and go into communication right now, but I think I'm going to hold it off for here. It's getting a bit to depressing. Sorry for that. And no, I'm not depressed. Just tired, anxious, worried, and a whole lot of other emotions. Anyways, take care. Have a good night.
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